The other night I turned the television off and actually sat down to try to write.
And I was blocked. Utterly and completely blocked. I have no idea for where the story is supposed to go next. There are a ton of scenes I need to add, mostly of the MMC. I'm maybe just over halfway to my end word count and there's a lot of ground to make up for.
I tweeted that my book was awful. (In less eloquent phrasing, I'm ashamed to admit.) Of course that garnered a pep talk from two of the most awesome people you'll ever meet on the internet. (And later this week I'll tell you how you can meet them, too. So stay tuned.)
Then I had some sort of breakthrough. Not a writing breakthrough, but an epiphany of sorts on why I was so stuck. One of my friends suggested working on something else for a while. I replied that I didn't know what to work on.
To which I replied that I'm so overwhelmed with projects I have no idea where to go. (Or something like that.)
I think that real life is part of my writing slump. (See last Friday's post.) But then I look at my writings folder on my computer and see so many projects, half-starts, and scrambled notes. Not to mention all the poetry that I still want the world to read.
And I feel so inadequate and overwhelmed with it all that I just close down. There's plenty of time in the day to work on writing. But because I don't know where to start when I look at all that work, I clam up faster than you can say pearl divers ahoy.
Worse? I have no inkling of an idea on how to deal with it. I think I'm just going to need to take a writing break for a while and find a good headspace. The trick is not beating myself up over not writing.